Bora Bora & Tetiaroa (The Brando)

The view from our Bungalow in BB.

I can’t believe I haven’t blogged in 3 ½ months!  I have so much that I wish I had reported in read time – our UCSB Family Vacation Center blast with Maryte & Oskar, our Labor Day weekend in Indianapolis with the Indy crew, Rosie’s 1^st birthday, my Kondo consultant seminar, our trip to Bora Bora & Tetiaroa, the launch of Styelvate… and of course, my lingering thoughts on that Game of Thrones finale!  Now that I read it all, it makes sense that I’ve been doing those Penny Press puzzles at night as a brain-drain instead of blogging.

Me the most relaxed I've ever been!

I’ll try to blog about all of the aforementioned things at some point but for now – vacation!  This was the best vacation of my life but I struggled with how to write about it.  It was so perfect that I feel like I could write 10,000 words and still not adequately express what it was like.  In the end, I decided to go with a Q & A format based on the questions I’ve gotten IRL.  But to start, I’ll say that there is something about the South Pacific that just sets the mind and body at ease.  We both have a lot going on work-wise and I really doubted whether we’d be able to relax.  On most trips, it takes me at least a day or two just to wind down from work and start to relax! Not this one.  I was relaxed from the moment we stepped off the plane in Bora Bora and pretty much maintained that state until I turned my laptop back on Thursday afternoon when we got home.  I’ve never had that happen before and that’s priceless!

The view from the shore at the Intercontinental Thalasso in Bora Bora.

Why Bora Bora & Tetiaroa?

To start, Matt and I wanted to go to Bora Bora for our honeymoon.  Then we realized how much it would cost and decided to shelve it for a time when we weren’t both jobless recent grads.  ;)  I spent about 3 days in Tahiti for work in 2013 and it killed me to be there without Matt (not to mention that I was in a conference room with accountants and lawyers for most of the time).  To cap it all off, Matt ended up going to Tahiti, Moorea & Bora Bora without me in the summer of 2018.  It became a joke – that’s where we go without each other.  By June of this year, we realized that we were in serious need of a vacation.  We hemmed and hawed about the expense of doing this now and whether it was the right time.  Then we realized that this was kind of like having a baby – there’s never really a right time; you just need to do it.

I wanted my own version of this photo that EVERYONE seems to take in BB.

Did we use a travel agent?

After years of grabbing those travel brochures on my way out of Costco I was shocked to learn that they are the real deal.  There are tons of perks to using them which I'm happy to share with anyone who is interested.  We ended up getting a great deal and I would definitely use them again.

These coffee tables are so cool!  We didn't see a single fish swim underneath so I decided to swim under and give Matt a show.

How did we pick where to go?

Bora Bora was a definite but we were still deciding between Moorea and the Brando on Tetiaroa.  After calling Costco Travel I created a spreadsheet to compare the different hotels and packages.  Matt and I talked about it for a few days and then called back.  We spent about an hour on the phone with our agent and talked through some decisions.  Ultimately we decided to forego the Conrad or the St. Regis, which I had initially set my sights on, in favor of the Intercontinental Thalasso Bora Bora, which allowed us to take advantage of a package since both the IC and the Brando are owned by Pacific Beachcomber.  By going with that package, we were able to get a halfboard meal plan at the IC and a true all-inclusive plan at the Brando (as in, everything is included and there's not even a bill presented to you at the end).

The lagoon water is prettier but the Pacific facing beach at the IC still had to be seen.  I'm not even a Pina Colada person but this one was incredible.

What did you pack?

I packed very little and it was still too much!  I’m thinking of doing a separate post on some tips I’ve picked up so I’ll keep this one short and just say that even the nicer restaurants there are so casual that you can get away with bringing 3-4 dresses, a bunch of swimsuits, casual sandals, and not much else.  Also, the hotels each had a full set of toiletries available and the Brando gives you flip flops, a beach tote, stainless steel water battles, and reef-friendly sunscreen too.

This was our villa!  Seriously.  This place was bigger than our apartment in Palms!  There was a media room.  Why?  Who would want to watch media on the edge of the Earth?

Were you bored since there isn’t much to do?

No way!  I know some people really need adventure and activities on their vacations but I’m not one of them.  I LOVE doing nothing and could’ve easily had another week of the same.  I was in heaven just reading, doing puzzles, occasionally working out, swimming and lounging about.  Also, the Brando actually has a lot of activities that are included in the price of your stay.  The Ultimate Tour and kayaking were a great burst of activity to offset our lazing about.  And it probably goes without saying but having alone time with Matt was the best. Even just having uninterrupted conversations felt indulgent but having over a week to be people and not parents or workers was amazing.  We pretty much just shot the shit for a full 8 days and I was reminded of all the reasons that I fell in love with him in the first place.

This was the view from our yard.  I can't even.  We had a full moon on the last night and Matt fell asleep before me.  I walked out to this spot and spent about 30 minutes stargazing (saw 2 shooting stars!) and contemplating the meaning of life without irony.  Crazy.

Would you bring the kids?
This is a hard one but I'm gonna say no. There was a family with 5-year old twins on our Ultimate Tour and it made me miss our kiddos a lot.  However, this place really is for lovers and I think it would take away from the experience of complete abandon to have to wear your parent hat as well.  On top of that, Matt and I think that this kind of trip is so extravagant that kids really don't deserve it and can't possibly appreciate it.  Basically, this kind of trip can only be appreciated if you've "earned" it by working your butt off and going on tons of "regular" trips against which to compare this one.  But if you see this as a child,  how can anything else ever impress you.  And the, how can you possibly become a normal adult if you think this is normal?

Our first night at the Brando we were treated to this picture-perfect rainbow.  

Was the food good?

I’ve heard conflicting answers on this one but I think it was.  However, I think it’s because we really stuck to the local stuff – lots of poisson cru and sautéed lagoon fish.  The food at the IC was nothing to complain about (and I actually liked their poisson cru marinade the best) but the food at the Brando was amazing!  We especially loved the Beachcomber cafe.  And I probably don’t need to say it but the cocktails were out of this world.  From the very first drink to the last, the bartenders kept topping themselves.

And this picture-perfect sunset.

How long is the flight?

It’s only 8 hours direct from LAX to and from Papeete, Tahiti. We flew on Air Tahiti Nui's new Dreamliner and it was great! We took a 45 minute flight to & from Bora Bora and then a 20 minute flight to & from Tetiaroa.  

We had an amazing tour guide named Thierry for our Ultimate Tour and kayaking adventure.  He was so friendly and fun.  We loved exploring Tetiaroa, which is probably the most visually arresting place on the planet.  There were so many moments where we felt like we were the only people on the whole island.

Who watched our kids & did we miss the kids?

My parents & brother, to whom we are eternally grateful!  The kids had such a blast with them and it was really special that they all got that time together.  For days afterward Jason was asking for them before bed and the next morning after they left, Rosie was calling "Popop," "MeeMa," and something resembling Uncle Brian ("Uuuu Byeeee") for them.  As for the 2nd part of the question, of course we missed them but not enough to interfere with the amazing time we were having.  Just being honest folks.

On our Ultimate Tour we ended up at this swimming spot.  The lighter colored water is about 3.5 feet deep and then it drops down significantly as it gets a deeper blue.  I couldn't take my phone in the water but the images of being in that water are seared in my brain.

Is the Brando worth the expense?

How you spend your money is deeply personal, but for Matt and I it’s an absolute yes.  We think of ourselves as pretty frugal people and there were more than a few moments leading up to this trip where we thought “What have we done?  It can’t possibly worth the amount of money we’ve already spent,” (Costco required pre-payment in full by the month before).  But as soon as we got there, we knew it was going to be unlike anything else we’ve ever done.

I love this photo because (1) Matt looks so handsome and (2) you can see the beach in his glasses.

The villas and restaurants are stunning but the true magic was in the service.  Matt likened it to Disneyland in that every single detail is contemplated and executed to perfection to create an immersive experience.  This incredible level of service coupled with the accommodations and natural beauty had me feeling the most relaxed I’ve ever felt in my entire adult life. 

Hanging out in the Brando Room of the Beachcomber.   

There are so many examples but here are the ones that come to mind now:

There’s no front desk and no check in. Instead, a manager gave us a private tour, took us to the bar for a late lunch (and a few mai tais!) since we mentioned we were hungry, and then came back to take us to our room afterward.

There are ~130 staff members on the island and every single one seemed to know our names, room number and itinerary ahead of time.  Everyone (whether they were in a guest-facing role or not) was kind, cheerful and thoughtful.  Providing that kind of hospitality in a way that allows the guest to feel comfortable and not like you’re imposing on them is a true art!

The beach in front of the Beachcomber, resort pool and Bob's bar.  Also, there's a little baby shark in this photo!  We saw quite a few baby lemon sharks and one mama shark.  Luckily they're docile and the aggro Tiger sharks are too big to fit through the reefs and get to the interior waters of Tetiaroa.

They stocked our bar and pantry with alcohol and snacks that we picked in the pre-stay questionnaire.  Every time we drank or ate something it would re-appear the next time we came back to the room.

Gratuity can be added lump-sum at the end and distributed evenly among staff, which struck us as much more fair than ad hoc gratuity that favors guest-facing employees. Tipping is always tricky and they made it easy and fair.

The end of our morning breakfast routine on our final day. We could've had breakfast in our room every day but I liked the ritual of going down to the Beachcomber and sitting in our spot.  Side note, I still love this clutch that Maryte gave me over 6 years ago! 

They rake and clean your villa’s deck, pool and beach every morning before you wake.  It sounds a little extreme but it was really beautiful to wake up to a pristine view every morning.  They have a small army of groundskeepers who do the constant and invisible work of keeping the resort perfect.

The bikes!  It’s a small detail but having your own bike parked outside your villa was so cool.  We had a nice laugh when someone told us that if we were “tired” after dinner, they would drive us back to our villa and return the bikes before dawn so we didn’t need to worry about biking back “tired.”  No BWT tickets for me!

On our last day I boldly took my phone in the water to get this parting shot of our villa. This is truly my happy place now.  At night as I'm falling asleep I can almost feel the sun on my face and the sand on my feet.